Friends Old and New

The easter holidays have been great for catching up with friends.

Just before the hols we were able to catch up with my friend Maz. Kian and I had not saw her for ages. I first met Maz in 2005. When I found out I was pregnant in May 2006, which was roughly a couple of hours after my driving test( 2nd time round passed), Maz was the first person I told. I called her as I was so in shock. I had just bought the tester on the off chance, just after I had been into a shop to buy a bottle of Moet to celebrate my passing of Driving test. She was actually in town shopping and had my call on hands free as I told her the news. She was a friend I met at work and she kept my pregnancy news until I was confirmed 3 months gone. What a lovely lady she is. She is a newly grandmother so had lots of toys and treats for Kian when we visited. He had a fantastic day! Kian had so much fun, love and attention that day, and I came away I think a half a stone heavier for what she fed me. Maz is someone who would have made a great childminder / nursery nurse. We spoke of that when we worked together and when I saw how she was with Kian, I know she would have been fantastic!

I drove back to Catterick one day with Craig so I popped to see my dear friend Rena. The last time we saw each other was when I was pregnant. It was lovely for her to see Kian for the first time. What is strange or co-incidental is that myself and Rena worked together a long time ago, but now she works with adults with learning difficulties. She started that job before I had Kian. What I love about real friends is that, it doesnt matter how much time you have had from seeing each other, when you meet up again there is nothing strange about it. It is like you only saw each other yesterday or spoke on the phone an hour ago.

It was lovely to catch up at home with one of my oldest friends. We used to live round the corner from each other when we were very little. We had matching prams and I used to love staying over on a weekend. Fast forward 15 years. In between that S had came to our night time wedding do, we went to her engagement do and there had been a letter or two in between. Then FaceBook comes along. Kian loved spending the morning with her two lovely children. Again, it did not feel like there was all that time in between and here were "our" children playing. Kian, bless him, enjoys the company of other children so much. He squeals with delight when other children are getting excited. Hopefully one of many catch ups.

My everyday friends know who they are. They are at the end of the phone. They are there for a catch up, be it with kids or without. They are the friends that are helping to arrange a charity event to raise funds for Wolf Hirschhorn Syndrome Trust. They are the friends who are there for me and Kian. They know how to pick you up. They know just to be there for you without words. I have had my circle of friends for years and that has not changed with Kian. When I look at other blogs or fb profiles I love to see to loyalty and love of friends, it means alot. My brother and sister I count as friends as well as siblings. Without them I would not be where I am with Kian.

In our now familiar world of disability, we have new friends. Maybe our paths would not have crossed if our children did not have the issues they do, but I have met some lovely people. I am meeting new parents that are coming into our world. I would like to tell them that this path is not as horrible as what some people say, but the truth is, it can be horrible. At times it is brutal, you have to fight for help, services and support that should be there for your family. But like I have said before and will hopefully continue to say, when you strip all the ugliness away of fighting for services and entiltlements, we have very special children.

When I check on Kian for the 6th, or 10th time that night, I could squeeze him with love. I love him because he is there. I love him because I am proud of what he has achieved that day. I love him because each time I walk into his room I never know if he will be breathing. This may sound melodromatic, but epilepsy does that to you. I check on Kian many many times of the night but I could be worse but we have to balance out worry v life. I do not feel unlucky to have Kian, I feel unlucky that he will not be able to achieve all in life that he should have been able to achieve. But Kian will achieve what we, family, friends and the community give him opportunity to achieve. He is a capable little boy, maybe just not in the ways that some people expect!